FamousQuotes140: Rita Rudner

Showing posts with label Rita Rudner. Show all posts

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. - Rita Rudner

My grandmother was a very tough woman. She buried three husbands and two of them were just napping. - Rita Rudner

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk. - Rita Rudner #quotes

I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight. - Rita Rudner #quotes

I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor's office was full of portraits by Picasso. - Rita Rudner

It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. - Rita Rudner #quotes

We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet - so we bought a dog. Well, it's cheaper, and you get more feet. - Rita Rudner

Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I want to be. - Rita Rudner

They usually have two tellers in my local bank, except when it's very busy, when they have one. - Rita Rudner

I don't plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face-lifts until my ears meet. - Rita Rudner

Most turkeys taste better the day after, my mother's tasted better the day before. - Rita Rudner

Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love. I'd stepped in it a few times. - Rita Rudner

My mother buried three husbands - and two of them were only napping. - Rita Rudner

I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to take care of them. - Rita Rudner

I got kicked out of ballet class because I pulled a groin muscle. It wasn't mine. - Rita Rudner

When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was Always. - Rita Rudner

The time you spend grieving over a man should never exceed the amount of time you actually spent with him. - Rita Rudner

I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry. - Rita Rudner

Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain and bought jewelry. - Rita Rudner

A man will go to war, fight and die for his country. But he won't get a bikini wax. - Rita Rudner

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